Yesterday morning, I got up early, went outside, got a bucket and shovel, and headed into the goat pen to dig up some good soil for my garden. What happened next was very funny, and I decided to let the goats tell you what happened…
It was a quiet morning in the goat pen, and all the goats were sleeping peacefully on the hill. A white goat named Roger slowly opened his eyes and yawned. A strange noise has woken him. What was it? He got up to investigate.
Something moving caught his eye. At the bottom of the hill, there was a girl-human! She was on her knees, sticking something shiny in the ground, then pushing it into a bucket. A bucket! Buckets meant food. Roger bleated loudly to wake the rest of the herd. “A bucket! A bucket!” The cry spread quickly through the herd, and all 14 goats stampeded down the hill towards the bucket and the girl-human.
The girl-human shook her head and made a strange noise with her mouth, like humans often do. She stood up, guarding the bucket with her shiny thing. The herd skidded to a stop, and Roger stepped cautiously forward to see if he could lure the girl-human away from the bucket.
He turned to face the herd, then called forward a young goat named Uncle. No one really knew why he was named Uncle, as he was quite small and not an uncle at all.
Roger leaned down to him. “Listen here. You’re still pretty cute. Go over there and lure the girl-human away from the bucket.” Uncle nodded and bounced towards the girl-human. He looked up at her and bleated. She waved her shiny thing at him, and he jumped away and scurried back to the safety of the herd.
Roger shook his horns, muttering. “Fine, then. I’ll do it.” He pranced forward mischievously and tried to slip past the girl. She waved her arms at him and shouted, then lifted the bucket into her arms.
The goats were beginning to get curious. A goat named King sniffed the air. “That bucket doesn’t smell like food to me.” The other goats were surprised. King was famous for his excellent sense of smell. If food wasn’t in the bucket, then what was?
Roger began to prance back up the hill. “Come on, herd. We’ll need to formulate a new plan to see what the girl-human has in her bucket.” The herd followed Roger, excited to help make a plan.
While the herd planned, a goat named Henry slipped away. He was curious to see what was in the bucket, too. And he had a plan of his own.
Henry tiptoed down the hill towards the girl-human at the bottom. She had her back turned to him, and was using the shiny thing again. The bucket was sitting next to her. Henry crept closer and closer to the bucket. Closer… closer…
Suddenly, the girl-human whirled around. She smiled this time, and Henry stared at her for a moment. She pushed the bucket towards him, and he cautiously sniffed it before peering inside. He was very confused at what he saw. Dirt? What did the girl-human want with dirt? He cocked his head curiously, then retreated up the hill to the herd.
Henry jumped onto a rock, puffed out his chest, and bleated loudly to get the goat’s attention. “Attention all goats! I have just returned from a dangerous journey, in which I battled the girl-human and discovered the secrets of the bucket!” The goats murmured excitedly among themselves.
Henry leaned down, his eyes wide. “Dirt. Dirt, my goats. The girl-human is gathering dirt. Why? I do not know.” He jumped down from the rock, his head held high. The goats gathered around him and clamored for his autograph.
From then on, he was know as Henry The Great.
So! What did you think of that story? It’s a little odd, but I had a ton of fun writing it. 😛 Our goats are very mischievous!
I’ll be posting some more of The Smallones this weekend! Keep an eye out for that. 😉
Thanks so much for reading!